Top Five Favorite TV Shows Returning for Fall 2013

Having posted my top picks for best and worst of the new 2013 Fall line-up, I return, dear reader, for one more TV-related post. For those die hard fans of this blog that are always blowing up my Facebook and twitter with book, TV, and movie recommendation requests (you know who you are), here are the five shows I'm most psyched to see returning to the Fall schedule:

1. Nashville - Great original music written by such musical talents as Elvis Costello and The Civil Wars, good lead casting in Connie Britton (Rayna James) and Hayden Panettiere (Juliette Barnes), this is a prime time soap in the classic sense with a country twist. If you like shows like Parenthood, Brothers and Sisters, or Private Practice for their interpersonal drama and angst, then this is a show for you. Forget the Dallas reboot; Nashville has all the country you need. The entire first season is still available on HuluPlus. Season two begins September 25 on NBC.

2. The Originals - I refuse to list this under new shows because the backdoor pilot ran during last year's The Vampire Diaries season and it carries with it, for better or worse, all of its TVD lineage. The good news is that the spin-off is being helmed by Julie Plec, one of the more talented writers from TVD's creative team, and someone who is very invested in getting this right. They will rerun the pilot soon, but if you really want to prepare for The Originals, you need to start watching a lot of TVD pronto. The show is set-up so you can jump in without the backstory, but I have a feeling you're going to get a lot more out of the show if you have a little Mystic Falls history under your belt. Plus, the show is being set in and shot on location in New Orleans, so if you're missing the Big Easy, take heart. The vampires, witches, and things that go bump in the night are bringing NOLA to prime time. the first three seasons of TVD are on Netflix, and six episodes from season four are still up on HuluPlus.  The pilot airs again on October 8 but you can catch the director's cut now on Hulu.

3. The New Girl - I will admit to originally writing this show off after two episodes as a bunch of hipster nonsense gifted to Zooey Deschanel because she's practically the poster girl for the ironically sincere youth of today, but I was wrong. I sat down and watched the first season last summer and the show was so weird and awkwardly funny it even sucked David in. Now we are both devoted fans of Jess, Schmidt, Nick, and Winston, and we can't wait to see what happens next. (Also, we really want to figure out more of the rules to True American). If you know David and I, you know we have fairly opposite tastes in TV, so if something manages to amuse both of us? That's probably something worth watching. Season one is available now on Netflix, and the last five episodes of season two are currently on HuluPlus. Season three begins September 17 on Fox.

4. Grimm - Yep. I'm addicted. Where Once Upon A Time lost me because the plot seemed stuck in the mud and the melodrama weighed down any sense of humor the show might have had, Grimm manages to remain fun, interesting, and full of dark humor. If you haven't been watching this lovely little show set in and shot on location here in Portland, you really are missing out. Start at the beginning, but give it two or three episodes to really find its feet. Once it does, the show is off and running with an originality half of the fall's new supernatural/sci-fi pilots wish they had. All of season two is available on HuluPlus. Season three begins October 25 on NBC.

5. Hart of Dixie - I cannot get enough of this Doc Hollywood remake starring Rachel Bilson as a Dr. Zoe Hart, big city surgical resident turned small town family practitioner. The cast is great and the writing is pretty funny, but what really works on this show, surprisingly, is the character development. I appreciate a show that can make the villain a sympathetic character, and can turn people at pods into believable friends. For people who enjoy films like Steel Magnolias, Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood, or Sweet Home Alabama, this show was tailor-made for you. And for those of you who share my affection for small town settings and interpersonal hijinx of The Music Man and Our Town variety, Hart of Dixie has a little something for you, too. I'll also add that anyone who misses the weird holidays and festivals of Gilmore Girls' Starshollow will find similar shenanigans afoot here in Bluebell, Alabama. Season one is available now on Netflix, and the last six episodes of season two are currently on HuluPlus. Season three begins on October 7 on The CW.

Runners-up: The Vampire Diaries; Haven; Community (mid-season return); The Mindy Project; Arrow.

So there you have it, folks. The best and the worst of the new shows and my personal favorite returning series. What about you? What are you most looking forward, old or new, to on the 2013 Fall TV line-up?

New TV is coming! New TV is coming!

On my flight to Nashville, I was treated to a preview of one of Fox's new fall shows, Sleepy Hollow. This reminded me that the new television season is upon us, and I have no made a single recommendation, prediction, or condemnation. This is a failing on my part, dear reader, for as we all know, I follow television development like other people follow sports.

Having already seen one of the fall's newest creative offerings, allow me, then to pontificate a bit on the state of new incoming entertainment options. Without further ado, here are my top five picks for the 2014 fall schedule:

1. Sleepy Hollow

Complicated premise is complicated. Read the wiki synopsis here. Based on the description alone, I would have never even green lit this to pilot. Amazingly, though, despite my deep misgivings, this may turn out to be one of the more interesting concepts on the fall schedule. The casting is terrific, particularly Tom Mison (Ichobad Crane) and Nicole Beharie (Lt. Abbie Mills), the two leads. FN1. As a person who is far more interested in writing and world building than the sexiness of celebrities, I am pleased to see how credible the acting is.

What makes the show enjoyable is that it manages to balance a legitimately creepy degree of horror with the humor of a man out of time.It's funnier and less dramatically hysterical than Haven (which I admittedly like) and less revolting from a human perspective than American Gothic or Hannibal. In the end, the pilot works because the writing works. Part of what saves this show it that it manages to treat the human relationships with sensitivity, handles responses to supernatural threats with the right blend of disbelief, fear, and acceptance (buy the premise, buy the bit), and yet also manages to make fun of itself and its situation. It's closest counterpart on TV right now might actually be The CW's Arrow. If the writing manages to stay as strong throughout the rest of the series as the pilot, we're in for some entertaining small-town New York shenanigans, ya'll.

Sleepy Hollow premiers Monday, September 16 on FOX. Recommended for fans of: Practical Magic; Witches of Eastwick (the film, not the poorly written show); the canceled-before-its-time series Happytown; the film adaptation of Constantine; Puddletown local favorite, Grimm.

2. Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Agent Phil Coulson puts together a small team of S.H.I.E.L.D. agents to handle strange new cases. Each case will test the team in cooperation and ingenuity as they try to work together figuring out newly emerging superhuman individuals in the world.

Yeah, yeah. Everyone and their mother is excited for this one. But, in their (and my) defense:

1.  Joss Whedon writes really good everything, including tv;
2. SUPERHEROES! Well, peripherally;
3. It helps fills the aching wound left by the cancellation of Alphas;
4. There is something really interesting about the lives of fragile humans who run toward, rather than away from, danger. These people are NOT gods and monsters. They're just like you and me (well, sort of). If you ever wonder what it would be like to be someone of extraordinary courage and ordinary talent in a world where superheroes are real, this is going to be one great show.
5. And seriously -- would you trust anyone else to do that good a job with these themes other than the man who wrote Buffy? NO. You would not. FN2.

Premieres Tuesday, September 24 on ABC. Recommended for people who: love anything Joss Whedon has ever written; love the Avengers universe; thought Noah Bennet was the real hero on Heroes; roots for the poor red shirts on Star Trek; remember that one time when Xander saved the world with his mouth.

3. The Michael J. Fox Show

Alex P. Keaton is back on prime time! This time playing a version of his real life self:

After being diagnosed with Parkinson's disease, Mike Henry had to give up his career as a news anchor and focus on his health and his family. Five years later, Mike decides to get back to work and struggles between family and career.

Is it emotionally manipulative? Yes, to some degree it is. Am I going to watch it? YES. Why? Because it's the most real thing I am going to see on television next fall, and that includes any 'reality tv' anyone produces. We've come a long way when a network will give a show to someone with a debilitating illness, not just someone PLAYING a person with an illness. Also, while the trailer makes it clear that the show will be full of feels for MJ regarding his condition, there will also be a lot of the humor derived from it. And there is something poetically human about that, about the way all of us find humor in our own suffering to make it through the day.

Premieres Thursday, September 26 on NBC. Recommended for: children of the 80s; people who enjoy family-style sitcoms; people who want to understand why every time the Glee producers have Artie go into a 'dream sequence' and magically be able to walk, I want to stab something.

4. The Tomorrow People

For those of you thinking, "Yeah, Joss Whedon, humanity is great and all but I want people with actual powers, not scrappy humans with moxie" then the CW is here for you. Premise? "Based on the original British television series of the same name, the series follows a group of young people who possess powers as the result of human evolution."

The Tomorrow People is the latest iteration of this trope, with a decidedly more YA/NA bent. This places the concept right in my wheelhouse, and the trailer seemed to have more going for it than Star-Crossed or The Hundred during Upfront season. Perhaps that is why it is the only one of the three with a fall time slot.

The Tomorrow People premieres October 9 on The CW. FN3. Recommended for people who love: Heroes; Alphas; Jumper; Push; the X-Men universe.

5. Mind Games

Okay, this is admittedly a little bit of a cheat on my part. Mind Games is not on anyone's calendar anywhere yet. It may never see the light of day. And yet, of all the upfront videos I watched, this was actually my favorite new show. I'm including the trailer here, so you can check it out:

Premieres midseason on ABC. I am hoping the fact that over 41,000 people have already liked the trailer on Youtube means Mind Games will eventually show up on ABC's mid-season fill roster. Casting was still active as of last month, so… *crosses fingers* For those of us already missing our regular "shady group of people manipulates situations for the greater good" shows, this one might fill the bill.

Recommended for fans of: Leverage; Lie to Me; The Mentalist; Franklin & Bash.

That's it for me on the new shows front. Anything you are looking forward to that I didn't mention? I'm happy to discuss in the comments below. Also, tune in tomorrow for my thoughts on the five WORST shows to hit the 2013 Fall line-up, which will appear over on my writing blog.

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FN1. Did anyone else notice this is the same protagonist name as Harper's Island? I hope it's a subtle shout-out. If so, well-done.
FN2. Though I STILL have not forgiven you for Buffy Season 9, Joss Whedon. Do you hear me? I AM NOT OVER IT. That was some Dallas-level plot betrayal, and those wounds cut deep.
FN3. CW is premiering everything late this year, I suspect in a bid to catch people watching new shows that fizzle after 1-3 episodes. I hope it works out for them.

With Love from the Link(wo)man!

Tomorrow is Valentine's, dear reader, and since I will be unavailable for most of the weekend due to out of town-ness, I bring you the following links of love and entertainment to keep you busy whilst I am away.

~ Any Valentine's Day perfume review round-up from around the netosphere would have to include this blog event from a group of lovely perfumers and bloggers who came together this week to offer the proverbial dozen roses for Valentine's Day by recommending rose-scented products to their readers. I could give you my list of roses, which would be long, but instead I'm going to give you my thoughts on their lists:

• I really like this list from Gaia at The Non-Blonde. I like the way she broke her list up, and I enjoyed the inclusion of "Vintage and goners" if only because they remind me to appreciate the perfumes I have; they won't always be available. The list is really good, too! Tauer Perfumes Une Rose Vermeille, Le Labo Rose 31, DSH Perfumes Rose Vert, and Aftelier Perfumes Wild Rose--oh my! I'm adding Providence Perfume Company Rose Boheme to my "To Try" list.

• Scent Hive has a great list, including one of my personal favorites, DSH Perfumes Dirty Rose.

• Ayala Moriel's SmellyBlog contribution includes a few familiar lovely delights--Rochas Tocade, Agent Provocateur--and a few items I am adding to my "To Try" list, in particular Jo Malone Rosewater & Vanilla and Velvet & Sweet Pea’s Purrfumery Kashmir Rose Whipped Body Butter.

• Perfume Shrine has the list that is probably the most similar to mine, and includes L'Artisan Parfumeur Voleur de Roses, Juliette Has a Gun Lady Vengeance, and L'Artisan Parfumeur Drôle de Rose, which I have full bottles of, and Tauer Perfumes Une Rose Chyprée, which I really should buy since I reviewed it glowingly twice.

• Ines of All I Am A Red Head, one of the loveliest reviewers I know, comes in with a list I am less familiar with, which makes me want to try them. I do like Worth Courtesan, though. It was one of my earliest rose loves.

• EauMG has an intriguing list that covers everything from perfume to tea to bubble bath to flavored syrup. I'll add yet another endorsement to Aftelier Perfumes Wild Roses which I can't believe I left out of my own Valentine's post, and Frédéric Malle Lipstick Rose.

• Katie Puckrik Smells also has a list with a lot of variety, including Jurlique Rose Hand Cream, which I love. Love, love, love. I need to order some more, in fact.

• Last but certainly not least, Roxana Villa of Roxana Illuminated Perfumes' contribution offers up a list one could only get from an all natural perfumer, and I love it:a list of her twelve favorite rose essences, as well as this curious link to a book entitled, How to Eat a Rose.

~ Also, because I myself have crashed my share of these organized events, I'm including The French Exit's list of rose scents for Valentine's Day. Thanks to Elisa for adding a few more "Must Trys" to my list!

~ In other perfume news, I f**king love this post from Angela at NST! about "Awful Perfume You Love." If you ever wanted to know my secret perfume shame, check the comments, dear reader. I confessed all.

In non-perfume related posting:

~ First up, I give you this hilarious (and yet somehow still creepy) video of Twin Peaks brought to you in the form of LEGOS! Yep. That's right, reader. Twin Peaks in Lego form. "Directed by Duplo Lynch and music by Angelo Brickalamenti." SPOILER ALERT if you have not seen the series.

 ~ In YA entertainment news, it appears Emma Roberts is set to play Lena in the Fox adaptation of Lauren Oliver's Delirium series.

I really like this series, both in concept and execution. I recall Emma Roberts was about as good in the Nancy Drew movie as she could have been given the material, so I'm hoping this pilot results in a pick-up for Fall.

~ Speaking of YA on the small screen, I saw that the CW's jettison pilot for Kiera Cass' The Selection is getting a reshoot. I haven't read the book yet (on my To Read list despite the epic GoodReads controversy/fiasco -- Google it if you're interested because I don't really want to link to/go into it), but I'm surprised it's getting a reshoot for a couple of reasons.

• First, CW's ratings for Vampire Diaries have been taking a beating lately. (I feel like I'm a Hobson's choice when it comes to ratings, live viewing, and Community vs. TVD scheduled head-to-head.) FN1. With Gossip Girl retired, The Carrie Diaries premiered to disappointing ratings, and the ratings for 90210 have also been weak. We all watched The Secret Circle crash and burn last season, and Life Unexpected ate itself as well 2010-2011. I'm wondering how much time and money the CW is willing to give teen-oriented material considering the success/failure rate.

• Second, Arrow has performed--for a CW show--better than expected and Beauty and the Beast is likely to be renewed based on its current ratings. Both of those shows tend to skew older than TVD and TCD. The backdoor pilot for TVD spin-off The Originals is already in the pike and I expect it to skew toward that same slightly older demo. If The Originals is a hit, I am doubly skeptical they'll be willing to sink money into a teen drama for Fall 2013.

• Thirdly, Cynthia Hand's Unearthly series was in development with the CW, but that project has since fizzled, and it is a wildly different series from The Selection. I get the vibe that CW wants to find another YA-novel-series-to-TV hit. I think they can't figure out what they're looking for, and they are kind of hitting all over the grid. If the real commitment is to trying to hit the moving target of 'of the moment' taste, that doesn't make for a high probability The Selection will make it, because I don't know how committed the developers of the series or the network execs are to making it work.

• Last, I also think the CW execs are critically underestimating that sometimes it isn't the source material that makes a show work; sometimes its the TV writing that makes the show work. (Cough! TVD! Cough, cough!) Just because Dystopian books are sohottrightnow doesn't mean making a dystopian-book-based series is going to work. It has to have good writing and a committed cast. You don't have to take my word for it; just look at the difference in performance between TVD in its target demo vs. Moonlight, both of which launched in the midst of Twilight-renewed vampire mania.

Wow. I did not know I had so many opinions about the CW programming at the moment. Moving on.

~Speaking of CW programming, my incredibly sweet friend Cara pointed me toward these virtual CW Valentine's cards featuring their male stars.  And while I'm all for upgrading my relationship with Ian SuperSmolder to "It's complicated," I'm a little peeved they didn't have cards featuring their female stars, too. Lovers of ladies don't deserve V-Day images? Does CW think it's only objectification if women are involved? Because new flash: you can definitely objectify men, and doing so does not mean we've reached 'gender equality.' As a lover of women as well as men, I'd have appreciated a Claire Holt option...or a Candice Accola option...or a Willa Holland option....

~ Did anyone see how #TellAFeministThankYou trended for basically an entire day on Twitter this week?  All trolling aside, it turned out pretty great.

~ In radio-oriented entertainment, I was introduced to the hilarious and hilariously named Irrational Public Radio. If you have any familiarity with NPR whatsoever, you are going to laugh so hard at this. They completely nailed both the tone as well as the voice acting.

~ In feminist things that delight me, let me direct your attention to The Hawkeye Initiative. What is THI? I'll let their explaination tell you all you need to know: "A blog with Clint 'Hawkeye' Barton being placed in the same provocative, female poses that are featured in superhero comics." Yeah. That is happening, and it is awesome.

~ Last, because it's Valentine's Day, I'll leave you with this animated short from Disney, Paperman. Paperman is a small romantic treat, like a satisfying piece of candy. Watch it and consider it my V-Day gift to you.

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FN1. As I wrote this, TVD, Arrow, and Supernatural all got renewed early. YAY for TVD fans everywhere. But seriously? Supernatural got another season? I, for one, am shocked. Not because of the ratings, but because I feel like they ran out of story about a season ago. I loved the early seasons, but at this point Sam and Dean's bickering over their trust issues feels like a character development fail. It would be nice to see them do something--anything--else.

Lax.

I know. I'm a neglectful fool, slack and lazy with your attention and hearts. I have no real excuse other than pleading busy. In the last three weeks I've had work plus: a public debate on reproductive freedom against a priest and a professional anti-choicer; gave a two hour lecture on the history of American feminism and the internal conflicts it still faces; and an eighty-person surprise party for my lively husband yesterday, which was a complete success thanks in equal parts to my lovely friends who pitched in and my ability to sustain a series of increasingly complex cascading lies. Apparently these people whom I love and have spent most of my adult life with had no idea I could carry a lie (I suppose knowing little to nothing about being both an an alcoholic's enabler and a domestic violence victim from the moment of conception) and were both a little frightened and impressed.

One friend: Well, I guess you are a lawyer.
Me: Yep. I have a doctorate in lying. (laughs) Actually, I've always been a good liar. That's why I don't do it anymore.
Other friend: Because once you lie once, you have to keep lying.
Me: No. Because it's so easy. It's so much easier to tell people what they want to hear. Once you start doing it, it's hard to stop. The truth is harder. That's why I don't care if people think I'm kind of a pain in the ass. I'd rather tell people the hard truth than lie to them. It's just my way.
*crickets*
Me: More drinks?

I have no perfume reviews for you yet, sadly. I will tell you that I wore L'Artisan Vanilia to the party (it was a bright, airy, afternoon thing) and for evening cocktails switched to slumberhouse Rume.

And to keep you tided over until the next few days when I can give you some reviews, I'll offer this: If you are missing out on either Downton Abbey (first season on Hulu Plus and Netflix Streaming) of Smash (Hulu Plus), you're missing some pretty entertaining hour long drama.

Downtown Abbey trailer






Smash trailer





They are both great shows with interesting characters and dynamic scripts.  You should check them out.

Also, I need to announce the winner of the Hunger Games drawing.  Without further ado:

____________________________________

True Random Number Service
List Randomizer

There were 4 items in your list. Here they are in random order:

Beth
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Timestamp: 2012-04-09 05:40:25 UTC

Congratulations Beth! Please email feminine(dot)things @ gmail(dot)com with your mailing info so I can send out your package.

Thanks all for hanging on while I run around like a chicken with my head cut off.  Later this week I'll have review for you, along with questions about long distance moving and road trip travel suggestions.

I know you're late for your next parade.

My birthday is this week and I already got my first present, which was a Fresh Sugar Kisses Mini-Lip Duo from Sephora as part of my membership. Yes, I'm counting that. I love going and getting my free gift, and no, I don't care that it's a trap to get me into the store in the first place. You know what I say to that? "Pop, pop!" FN1.

I also bought myself the Caron sampler pack at Luckyscent, and a few other things I'll be telling you about soon. I'm thinking about getting one of the London Blooms LEs from Jo Malone, so I'll probably have something about those up this week.  I stopped at a counter last week and I can't stop thinking about the Peony & Moss one...

Yesterday at work one of my fellow cubemonkeys brought in a T-Pain mike which autotunes your voice for our boss to use during the staff meeting since she can't talk loud enough for everyone to hear. I don't know what was weirder: that he did it, or that she proceeded to use it. But I digress...

The tulip heads are struggling to emerge on the Hill, despite us having some ice and snow the last couple of days. For the last twelve years, I've known Spring was on the verge of arrival by watching for those tulip shoots. I don't know what I'll be watching this time next year, but I do have a list of scents I will be wearing into the hope of seasonal renewal.

Newly added to the list? Providence Perfumes Co. Hindu Honeysuckle is described as being "From India With Love... Revered for its lush aroma, honeysuckle symbolizes generosity and kindness. Notes of sweet Indian Jasmine Sambac meld with green vetivert, musk ambrette, rose and coriander. Crisp bergamot belies the sweetness of honeysuckle."

Hindu Honeysuckle is a terrific Spring scent. Not overly sweet, this is a nice rich floral scent. It's almost...lemony at the open on me, surprisingly light and cirtusy for the musk base. It's not at all creamy like some of the other honeysuckles I've tried and there is nothing foodie sweet about it. Instead it is reminds me of the feeling of playing on your back against the warm ground as crystalline sunlight falls through the tender leaves of newly budding trees across your face. What I like most is the tartness; it manages to be lemony floral without smelling like astringent or cleaner. I think for me what saves it is the heavy warmth of the musk. A truly fine warmer weather scent, somehow delicate and still strong. Sillage is low to moderate on me, and the longevity was fantastic! I could still smell it on my skin eight hours later.

Available direct from the perfumer, you can get 1oz (33 ml) for $115.00 or a 6ml travel atomizer for $26.00. Samples also available and recommended. 3.5 of 5 nods.

~ ~ ~

Another surprising spring scent? slumberhouse Sana. I was thinking of it just last weekend when I was driving around the Oregon Coast in the freezing rain and loving every minute of it.

If you’ve ever listened to Rachel’s “Selenography” while driving through the crushingly scenic roads that wind through the woods along the Oregon coast late at night you’ll have an idea of the things that inspired Sana. Absolutely gender neutral (though I like to imagine the right woman wearing this), Sana is an atmospheric perfume that revolves around a chord of tagetes syrup, fir balsam and suede. Behind this is an ethereal smattering of magnolia, thorns, honey, red raspberry leaf absolute and sweet birch.

The open smells strong of a medicinal sticky wood resin and dry pencil shavings.  There's something else almost peppery.  I didn't get an honey, really, but a lot of thorns and birch and a little bit of magnolia.  The red raspberry leaf, if you get any, should come in as this faint sweet highlight.  At least it did for me and only when I was mentally looking for it.  It is a strange and lovely scent, but not traditionally oceanic or beachy at all.  Keep that in mind when you try it.  Still, for me it reminds of the cold wet Spring of woods of coastal Oregon, which was strange and lovely. Low sillage on me, Sana wore close to the skin for 4-6 hours.  3 of 5 nods.

Sana is available here 30ml for $75.00. Samples also available.

What are you smelling for spring my lovelies? Has any warmth hit your climes yet? What do you think I should get for my birthday?

"Time.
Thought I'd make friends with time.
Thought we'd be flying.
Maybe not this time.
Baker, baker, baking a cake.
Make me a day; make me whole again."
~ "Baker, Baker," Tori Amos

__________________
FN1. Is anyone else really excited Community returns to NBC on March 15?

Six seasons and a movie!

Favorite coupledoms in Movies/TV/Books

Dear reader,

Do you know what a 'shipper is? It's someone who gets super into relationships in pop culture and feels very strongly about the fates and futures of said relationships. I, dear reader, am a shipper. I'm not hardcore, per se. I don't write fanfiction to create alternate universes where my couples get together. I don't wear 'TEAM' t-shirts. But I do strongly identify with a fictional relationship occasionally and root for that relationship.

So in honor of it being Valentine's week, and because I am feeling especially sappy this year, here is a list of a few of my favorite 'ships from movies, books, and television, along with a (sometimes unconventional) song for them and a scent or two.

~~~

1. Debi Newberry & Martin Blank, Grosse Pointe Blank

You know the story. "Spring of '96. Two young lovers with frightening natural chemistry. A girl sits in a seven hundred dollar prom dress on the front steps of her house, waiting for the most romantic moment of her young life. Boy never shows up. Not until now." Debi and Martin are wonderful because they lead us to believe those that loved us once, and loved us best, might still love us again. Even in an ugly callous cynical and sarcastic world like the one of Grosse Pointe Blank, love conquers all -- in fully-automatic style.

Martin: "I'm sorry if I fucked up your life."
Debi: "It's not over yet."

Song: Peter Gabriel, "Let My Love Open the Door (To Your Heart);" Neko Case, "This Tornado Loves You"
Perfume: I always think of Debi (half) ironically wearing CK Obsession to the reunion. Is that weird? Martin does have obsessive recurring dreams about her... Martin doesn't wear anything. Someone might smell him coming.

~~~

2. Jane Eyre & Edward Fairfax Rochester, Jane Eyre

Now and forever, Jane and Edward will stand out in my mind as two sad and broken people who find each other and, despite great obstacles of circumstance and social convention, rebel against everything in defense of their love for one another. Is their relationship problematic? Sure. Could I forgive Edward if I were Jane? I don't know. I only know that when she hears his name on the wind, she goes to him, and I am glad she does.

Songs: Depeche Mode, "Somebody," The Decemberists, "Hazards of Love"
Perfume: For Jane, Guerlain Mitsouko; For Rochester, Guerlain Habit Rouge.

~~~

3. Nora Grey & Patch Cipriano, Hush, Hush series

I wasn't sure how I felt about Patch initially. He ran hot/cold and was often mean, way meaner than Daniel was to Luce in Fallen. It's hard to resist roguish, though. Is it wrong when I mentally picture Patch, he's basically Jess Mariano? But, you know, more of a '50s tough, and angelic. I like that Nora doesn't always trust him and isn't always willing to listen. I like that she makes her own decisions. Over the course of the series, Nora grows into one of the bravest female protagonists I've found in YA today. I'm excited to see how the series resolves.

Songs: Lou Reed, "This Magic Moment;" The Smiths "There is a Light That Never Goes Out"
Perfume: Patch is supposed to smell like "mint and earth," so I'm tossing CB I Hate Perfume Black March onto the list, but I admit I also associate Il Profumo Patchouli Noir with Patch and Nora.

~~~

4. Ethan Wate & Lena Duchannes, Beautiful Creatures

Ethan & Lena - you want to talk about two kids who will break your heart? Here they are. The most wonderful thing about this series is that the stories are told from Ethan's perspective, and he's the devoted and wounded one most of the time. Lena is confused, wild, willful, and non-conformist. And even when they're apart, their love is strong enough it could reconfigure time and space, even tear the world in two.

Songs: The Band Perry, "Walk Me Down the Middle;" Alison Brown, "Every Day I Write the Book;" The White Stripes, "Sugar Never Tasted So Good"
Perfume: Lena's scent, rosemary and lemons, which always makes me think of Miller Harris Fleurs de Bois, because it's meant to be a warm weather scent and it is always hot in Gatlin.

~~~

5. Bella Swan & Jacob Black, Twilight

Yeah, yeah, Edward is forever, he and Bella are both eternal sparkly diamond parents. Call me a heretic, but to me the more interesting relationship isn't the first person you love who screws you over, abandons you, and breaks your heart. It's the person who comes after them. The person that says "Yes, I see how broken and messed up you are. That's okay. I'll love you, anyway." That's the person who restores my faith in humanity, my hope for a better love tomorrow. You know that Garth Brook's song, "Unanswered Prayers"? I love that song. Because Charlie is right - sometimes you have to love what's good for you. Or at least, here in the non-sparkly world, you should.

Songs: Soltero, "The Moment You Said Yes;" Linda Ronstadt, "When Will I Be Loved;" Natasha Bedingfield, "Pocket Full of Sunshine"
Perfume: I always think Bella must smell like food since people want to eat her, but if we focus on the non-blood drinkable parts of Bella (Are there any?), then I want to give her and Jacob a warm, sunny scent reflective of their warmth and Bella's desert origins, like Tauer Perfumes L'Air du Desert Marocain or  Olympic Orchids Arizona. (Too on the nose?)

~~~

6. The Doctor & Rose Tyler, Doctor Who

They traveled through time and space, exploring both together and saving the world.  They literally bent (and sometimes broke) the laws of the universe to find one another even when it seemed. Their isn't just a love for the ages, it is a love for all ages, all times, all dimensions. He's her mad man in a blue box; she's his Bad Wolf. Enough said.

Songs: Lykke Li, "Unrequited Love;" David Bowie, "Modern Love;" Beatles, "Here, There, and Everywhere"
Perfume: I want to put Rose in something excellent like By Kilian Back to Black, but she's probably wearing Burberry Brit with those overalls. And I can't scent the Doctor, but I  know Esscentual Alchemy Natural Perfumes has taken a delightful stab with Time Lord, found here.

~~~

7. Elena Gilbert and Stefan Salvatore, The CW's The Vampire Diaries

I know, I know. Believe me. Damon and Elena means more Damon, and who couldn't use more of that?  Damon is so hot sometimes I think my eyeballs will literally melt out of my head. But when it comes to Elena, I'm going to have to say that she was a healthier, happier person with Stefan, and Stefan was a less Ripper/slightly more broody version of himself. They love each other and they're better for and with each other. We're all going to have to deal with that.

(Which leaves Damon conveniently available....right?)

Songs: Fiona Apple, "Slow Like Honey;"  Feist, "1-2-3-4;" Iron & Wine, "Such Great Heights"
Perfume: Elena is so innocent, but I can't help but imagine her running around Mystic Falls in Agent Provocateur. Okay, maybe she only wears that only when she starts running around in one of those ridiculous Founder's event ballgowns.  The rest of the time she probably rocks something like Prada Infusion d'Iris. Stefan probably wears something youthful and full of denial, like Davidoff Cool Water or Thierry Mugler Angel AMen. (And I like to imagine Damon wearing Bvlgari Black, and his songs for Elena have to be Chris Issak's "Wicked Game" and Ok Go's "A Million Ways to be Cruel".)

~~~

8. Logan Echolls & Veronica Mars, Veronica Mars

Oh, Veronica and Logan. How I love to want to kill both of you for being stupid.  If ever two people were a disaster of epic love proportions, it is you two. You hurt each other over and over, and yet there is not a moment after the kiss on the balcony that I cannot see you together. It just seems cataclysmically meant to be.

Logan: "I thought our story was epic, you know? You and me."
Veronica: "Epic how?"
Logan: "Spanning years and continents. Lives ruined and blood shed. Epic!"
Veronica: "Come on. Ruined lives? Bloodshed? You really think a relationship should be that hard?"
Logan: "No one writes songs about the ones that come easy."

Songs: Mike Doughty, "I Hear the Bells;" Blair, "Hearts;" The Be Good Tanyas, "In Spite of All the Damage I've Done"
Perfume: Veronica wears Jovan White Musk (Okay, this is a cheat KBell wears it herself, and I can't not think that when I mentally sniff her.) For Logan, something warm and sexy and not necessarily traditional - Costume National 21 or CB/Alan Cumming's 2nd Cumming.

~~~

9. Buffy Summers & Angel, Buffy: The Vampire Slayer

One girl in all the world... and one vampire redeemed find love against all odds. It's written in the stars by the Powers that Be.  Some day, hopefully in the not so distant future, she will stop carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders. And when she does, the monster she made a man will be waiting. (I mentally retcon the Angel/Cordelia fiasco. When it comes to Angel and Buffy, there can be only one.)

Angel: "You still my girl?"
Buffy: "Always."

Songs: Urge Overkill, "Girl You'll Be a Woman Soon;" Bat for Lashes "Siren Song;" Tom Petty, "Angel Dream (No. 2)"
Perfume: Serge Luten Bois de Violette, which I cannot justify. I don't even know where Buffy would come by such a thing. I just feel like she would. Or maybe Atelier Grand Neroli? Sweet and not necessarily innocent or fragile, but hopeful nonetheless, particularly in those early seasons.

~~~

10. Sydney Bristow & Michael Vaughan, Alias

In the first three seasons of this show, their love was so amazing and palpable and yet played with such restraint and subtly that I could not get enough of it. There is this scene from the first season that completely sold me on this relationship. Sydney is having an awful time.  She calls Vaughan and they meet on a pier pretending not to be together.  Overcome, Sydney starts sobbing, and you can just tell it is killing Vaughan he can't hurt her or help her or make it better.  Then Sydney reaches out and takes his hand, even though she's not supposed to and its dangerous and stupid and could blow her cover and get them both killed, because she cannot help herself. Even though  she can't even look back at him, and it doesn't matter because...he's her anchor.  He's the thing that keeps her in that moment from giving up.  From that moment on you just know somewhere deep inside, no matter what happens, they'll find their way back to one another.

Songs: Peggy Lee & Benny Goodman, "All I Need Is You"; Beatles, "I've Just Seen a Face;" Robin Thicke, "When I Get You Alone"
Perfume: Sydney might where a lot of different scents with her costumes, but she strikes me as a classic sort of girl -- Chanel No. 5 or Worth Je Reviens, maybe? Something that screams classic and elegant and refined, but not too noticeable - a great cover for the dangerous, adventure-loving spy in us all.

I have a tough time scenting Michael Vartan because I feel like, having spent a huge portion of his formative years in France, he'd have some strong personal preferences.  Vaughan, on the other hand, probably wears something very work-a-day government handler, like Old Spice. Boring, conventional, reliable, but also...attractive.

~~~

That's my list.  What couples for you 'ship, dear reader? I see Titanic is being re-released in 3D soon.  Who wants to tell me what they think Jack or Rose would wear?  Wish I'd done Tara & Willow from Buffy instead? Any Luke Danes/Lorelai Gilmore fans out there? What about Wash & Zoe from Firefly? Or Brian Kinney & Justin Taylor from Queer as Folk? (I will never forget that dance scene.) 

Inquiring 'shippy minds want to know.

Fantasy Perfume Line: Twin Peaks Perfumery

Smells those trees, smell those Douglas Firs. ~ Special Agent Dale Cooper

So since this came up recently an awesome Twitter exchange with Meredith and Victoria, I thought I’d post about it. For a couple of months, I’ve been thinking about how if I were a perfumer, all my scents would revolve around some weird pop culture reference because that’s how my mind works. I don’t have any plans to become a perfumer, but I like to think about what I’d make and what it would smell like. I even considered buying accords and trying to mix my own, knowing that I’ll never quite get to the high end chemistry part of perfumery.

To that end, I bring you Diana’s fantasy perfume line. The first installment would be inspired by David Lynch’s cult classic television show, Twin Peaks. If you knew me in real life, you would know I am obsessed with Twin Peaks. I have been since it aired when I was twelve. I watched the original series, bought Laura’s diary (totally inappropriate for the average twelve year old, btw), and still own Agent Cooper’s cassette tapes to Diane, though I have nothing to play them on anymore. My twenty-seventh birthday was a Twin Peaks-themed Party, and I dressed as dead Laura Palmer, complete with stiff plastic wrapped like a tall collar. I am so familiar with Angelo Badalamenti’s work that when I heard Neko Case’s “Look for Me (I’ll Be Around)” I thought, “That reminds me of Badalamenti’s work with Julee Cruise.” Then I discovered that was her inspiration. Only a “meh” fan of the Dresden Dolls, I completely fell in love with Amanda Palmer when she made Who Killed Amanda Palmer? because the album can be dark and mysterious like my beloved TP.

You get the idea. There are fan and there are fanatics. I’m the latter.

Part of why I love Twin Peaks is because the show embodies the five senses like so little else does. There is ongoing dialogue and mysterious clues that revolve around things you can only smell or hear or feel, which is super cool considering the media involved in the actual storytelling is visual only. From the way the presence of evil smells like burnt engine oil to the opening few scenes that describe phone static by way of saying “it has that open air sound, y'know? Where, it sounds like wind blowing, like wind blowing through trees…” to the universal obsession with a damn, fine cup of coffee, the show begs you to see, smell, hear, and even feel your way through the series.

So, in the vein of all things Peaks-related, here are my fantasy perfumes, and what I imagine they smell like:

The Double R Diner - “This must be where pies go when they die.” Notes: cherry pie and strong black coffee, a coffee “black as midnight on a moonless night.”

The Packard Sawmill - “Insurance investigator should read ‘arson’ block letters, about six feet high.” Notes: saw dust, scotch pine, burnt wood.

The Great Northern - “In a large building with many rooms alike. But occupied by different souls night after
night.” Plus, someone is trapped there. (Notes are vaguely spoilery.) Notes: Douglas fir, wet stone, cherry blossom, green tea.

Donna Hayward - Twin Peaks true good girl, voted “Most Likely to Succeed” in her Senior Class. Even when she tries to be bad, she's still so very good.  “When did you start smoking? “I smoke every once in a while; it helps relieve tension.” “When did you get so tense?” “When I started smoking.” Notes: Ginger ale and a butter cookie, but with a faint hint of cigarette smoke.

My Name is Audrey Horne and I Get What I Want - And what Audrey wants is her own perfume. Notes: Lipstick wax; the leather of brand new saddle shoes; ice cream cone (“Cup or cone?” “Cone. I like to lick.”); grapefruit (“As long as those grapefruits are...freshly squeezed."), and maybe a hint of cherry stem.

As Agent Cooper sexily notes, “Audrey, that perfume is intoxicating."

Fire, Walk With Me - All things Bob, and probably too terrifying to wear. Notes: grinding train rail, the coopery smell of blood, bonfire, burnt rubber, engine oil.

Special Agent Dale Cooper - “Dear Diane…” The ultimate intuitive detective, who dreams of mysterious secrets, shoots like a pro, and only drinks black coffee and Black Yukon Sucker Punches. And who makes a tucked in plaid shirt sexy in a way no one else can. Notes: gun smoke, shiny badge metal, crisp clean sheets, coffee, and whiskey.

And finally…

She’s Filled with Secrets - A tribute to the one and only Laura Palmer. Notes: Ink, diary pages (“We found her diary.” “No, there’s a second one.”), forest floor (“a necklace buried in the woods”), river water, and a hint of plastic (“She’s dead. Wrapped in plastic!”).

As for living Laura, she would probably smell like a big and sexy expensive department store scent from working at the perfume counter at Horne’s Department Store. (“He named it after himself.”)

Remember, “it’s the sweetest smelling job she’s ever had.”

Are you a TP fan?  If so, let's hear your ideas of some "little man from another place" (that's LMFAP to you fans out there) perfume ideas! Or ideas about Lil, my brother's sister's gal!  Or Harold, the iris growing recluse!

"The stars still shine bright.
The mountains still right.
Yet something is different are we falling in love?
Falling, falling...
Are we falling in love?"
~ "Falling," Julee Cruise

But today? Sorry, Lady. I have ennui.

 

Like Michel, I am suffering from ennui.  Serious ennui.  So significant is this ennui that I have not even tried any of my new samples yet, nor did my weird experiment of trying CB I Hate Perfume Black March layered with CB I Hate Perfume Smokey Tobacco Accord today make so much as a dent.  I'd try free writing to you all, but (and I'm am in full GG-mode of late) my free-writing tends to turn out like Lorelai's "monkey monkey underpants!" letter. (Don't know it? Follow the link.)  Trust me, no one wants that.

No, you'll just have to give me a few more days, dear reader.  I'm trying very hard to figure out why I randomly feel blue, but I just don't think putting on Guerlain L’Heure Bleue is going to help.  I'm sorry.  I love you.  I wish I could put together a coherent thought.

Until next we meet, monkey monkey underpants!

Question of the Day: What scent says, to you, "I love you"?

Because I didn't want to go an entire day without some sort of perfume talk, I'd like to pose a question raised for my by one of my favorite shows running on TV right now. I'm a big fan of Bones. FN1 I didn't like the pilot initially, but after David, who liked the show right away, convinced me to watch a few more episodes, I got hooked. Now it's one of "our shows" (to differentiate it from the enormous panoply of TV I watch every week, since I tend to be a multitasker who hates being home alone and must have a TV or music on for company all the time).

Anyway, in Season 2, Episode 9 (Aliens in A Spaceship), one of the male protagonists, Dr. Jack Hodgins, is secretly(ish) in love with one of the female protagonists, Angela Montenegro. FN2 In an effort to express this, he buy her perfume. Specifically a "crazy expensive" perfume, called "Deep Rhapsody." This perfume, shown in a small falcon, is purported to be $3,000 an ounce. In describing it, he says:

I'm nuts about Angela. Over the moon. Stupid in love with her. That's why I bought her that ... that crazy, expensive perfume. A man gives you a bottle of perfume like that, it says ... it says, "I love you". (Brennan nods) There. I said it out loud.

A bottle of perfume that says, "I love you." I know that, in this particular case, Hodgins is describing the obscene gesture, the amount of money spent to buy something rare and fine and intimate in order to tell a woman that he feels that way about her. FN3 But of course, my perfumey brain immediately went to work: what scent to me, if given to me, would say, "I love you"? Clearly. Unequivocally. I love you.

The first scent I thought of was S-Perfume 100% Love, but that might be a bit too....literal? Although I do love it, and it does make me feel comfortable and happy. Something Limited Edition or discontinued or vintage, like L'Artisan Iris Pallida or my beloved Ava Luxe Blackberry Musk or vintage Dior Diorissimo, which is rare and hard to find, just like real love? Something sensual, like Juliette Has a Gun Lady Vengeance (which, to me, is dangerous and provocative) or Tauer Perfumes L'Air du desert marocain (which, to me, is big and audacious and powerful and seductive)?

In the end, though, I guess like Hodgins I think the mere act of perfume giving is an act of loving. It's personal. It's difficult. It's intimate and familiar and it requires taking a risk by having something you find beauty and value in being under appreciated or misunderstood or just flat rejected. Like a handmade Valentine, or a carefully tracked mixed-tape, a gift of perfume says, "I thought about you, and how I feel about you, and I chose this as an expression of my love for you and I hope to hell you appreciate it because it will hurt me if you don't."

It reminds me of my wedding ring. When I first opened the box holding my engagement ring, I had two simultaneous thoughts: (1) Wow, that is not really in almost any way what I told him I wanted -- it's way to frail and thin and tiny and feminine and not at all what I would ever imagine for myself. (2) Wow. That is exactly what I never knew I wanted. It is so thin an delicate and beautiful. I have never seen myself that way. I never even knew I wanted to. I'm so...touched. In choosing this ring, which he had designed without my knowledge, my husband took a big risk in hoping a symbol he wanted me to wear for the rest of my life to represent our love and bond, David was telling me something about me and about his love for me. That is a very vulnerable, and therefore emotionally dangerous, thing to do. Choosing a perfume for someone is, to some degree, the same.

What about you, dear reader? What scents say "love" to you? Perhaps, for me, I was right on the money with 100% Love, after all.

2/12/12 Editors' note: Thanks to Anon for posting in to correct my bad math.  Hodgins bought perfume was $3K for 1/4 ounce. That's $12K an ounce! Hot damn.  That is really expensive perfume.

_____________________________________
FN1 SPOILER ALERT!
FN2 I'd have embedded a clip but I couldn't find one. Sad panda. :(
FN3 Please excuse the whole heterosexist and gender essentialist bent of this post. Basically anyone buying anyone else this kind of perfume would probably adequately express deep affection...or a willingness to pay for sex. Depending on how it was presented.

On the Death of Dixie Carter, the Life of Julia Sugarbaker, and Feminist Role Models for Southern Women

I was going to post a perfume review tonight of Jo Malone Pomegranate Noir, but that's going to have to wait.

I just discovered that Dixie Carter died.

I think I am truly, deeply hurt by this.

You see, Dixie Carter, a real life woman of poise and grace and talent, is a woman I have always respected, talent-wise, though politically we never saw eye-to-eye. But if you want to trace back my feminist roots, if you want one solid, singular pop-culture icon to point to as one of the most influential figures in my young life, it would have to be Julia Sugarbaker of Designing Women.

Julia, whose verve and style were matched only by her fiery independence, oratory finesse, and incredible substance. Julia, who defended women, liberals, gays, and crazy people. Julia, who is possibly the best of all possible Southern icons, who makes me feel proud of the Southern left in me. I'm not sure I even would have thought of it unless prompted, but here's the honest truth: I didn't want to be a single woman I knew when I grew up. Not one of them was successful or independent or smart or out-spoken in the way I longed to be. But Julia Sugarbaker, that's a woman I could have written you a ten page "Who I Want to Be When I Grow Up" paper on in 5th grade. Business owner, single mother (after her husband died), social activist, feminist, charity and foundation board member, philanthropist, and dedicated friend -- my God, if I could be even a 10th of this woman, if I could be remembered half as brave or honest or truly fine as this woman, I could die happy.

As anyone who has ever looked at an electoral map will know, liberals are hard to find in the American South today. They have been hard to find basically my whole life. So as a young girl with a big brain and an even bigger mouth, it can be hard to look around and notice the incredible lack of feminist role models. The women I grew up with all seemed sad, frustrated, angry, and/or disappointed with their lot in life, like their expectations for themselves and who they could have been and what they could have accomplished in life fell far, far short of their dreams. Their lives were limited by, and revolved around, the men they were financially dependent on, and they seemed to accept this grim fate as the natural order of the world, one that could not be opposed, dissected, fought, or defeated. In the face of such a depressing norm, they seemed to simply embrace it, and lord help the woman who might be otherwise, for their jealousy might eat them up inside and spew out in the form of a kind of venom that would kill you with its backhanded kindness. (To be fair, this description really only fits my mother and some of the local teachers and other women figures in my world, and less the women of my paternal family, who just seem to accept it with a kind of glum resignation, or worse, a crazy-eyed embrace that drives them to radical right-wing insanity.)

But Designing Women, which started when I was eight and ran back-to-back with another amazing show centered on a strong female character, Murphy Brown, showed me an entirely different world. Four women, all working -- even if they were mothers -- who were professionally successfully, financially independent, and mostly happy, even though they were on their own for a variety of reasons. Suzanne and her rotating bevy of rich and (sometimes literally) short-lived romances/husbands. Mary Jo the divorcee and J.D., her steady but not life altering boyfriend/traveling sports writer. Charlene, the only one married in the entire series really, whose husband was mostly absentee due to his military service. And of course, Julia, who managed to be a devoted wife to her deceased husband and yet still demand the most interesting, charming, successful, and intelligent (sparing) partner is Reese (Dixie's IRL 3rd husband). These women had careers. These women had adventures. These women had lives of their own, and the men who came and went were just along for the ride. Designing Women was one of my first looks at a world people with, guided by, and focused on women, and NOT as they related to men.

While I enjoyed Annie Pott's sarcasm and Delta Burke's bluntness, it was Julia I truly worshiped. People in other parts of the country, in my experience, are too polite in general, and when they are honest, they tend to forget that other people take their verbal beatdowns a lot better if the proverbial switch is covered over in spun sugar. Julia embodied this to a tee. She was somehow both bossy and refined, classy and brash, hell-on-wheels and homemade cookies, all at the same time.

This was my real role model. This was a woman who was liberal and brave and righteous and God-loving and Southern, so Southern, and yet at the same time, sublime. And to this day, every time I start to get upset because people don't like me because I am ALWAYS the one UP ON MY SOAPBOX and I am ALWAYS the one getting 'RILED UP' and yelling, and I am always, always, always stepping on people's toes and getting in trouble for it and feeling like doors slam closed on me because of it, I remember Julia, and I try to tell myself -- even if she was only fictional -- if she could do it, then so can I. If she could be proud and hold her head up, then I can to, and to hell with anyone who doesn't like me for it.

I am who I am today, in part, thanks to Julia Sugarbaker, and I think we would all be better served to be a little more like her. It seems strange that the Designing Woman who shone the brightest has left us first, even before 'crazy' Aunt Bernice. Dixie Carter will always have my gratitude for giving life to a woman I could look up to and be proud of while still being myself. May she live on forever in our memory. God bless her and keep her in the hereafter. Amen.

More favorite Julia clips below

Defending her sister, and pageant women everywhere...






On How Southern People Feel About Their Relatives...






On Football in the South...






On HIV/AIDS and Respect -- Amazing in general, but especially for 1987. The video quality is crap, but the content is definitely WORTH HEARING.






~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No clip of this one, so here's the transcripts.

MAN: Allow me to introduce myself — Ray Don Simpson.
JULIA: There’s no need for introductions, Ray Don, we know who you are.
RAY DON: (smiling) You do?
JULIA: Of course. You’re the guy who is always wherever women gather or try to be alone. You want to eat with us when we’re dining in hotels, you want to know if the book we’re reading is any good, or if you can keep up company on the plane. And I want to thank you, Ray Don, on behalf of all the women in the world, for your unfailing attention and concern. But read my lips and remember, as hard as it is to believe, sometimes we like talking just to each other, and sometimes we like just being alone.